Take Her Back

                                                                                                                                                      June 8, 2020

Dear little girl who wishes someone would take her back,

Take heed my child, Rose knows and if my heart was made of rose gold, my lemonade tears would fall on Rose's nose- Excerpt from Breathing Under Water.

As I sit here thinking about my art piece titled Take Her Back, I began the piece in 2018 and now summer 2020 during Covid-19, after my fourth time going inpatient for mental health treatment, no more than a month from being divorced and no more than a month from losing my grandmother Dicie, I can still take my mind back to the first night I told my mother I hated her. As I look at my piece of art I can still find "hate" three times. Why would someone want to take me back if I still have hate in my heart? You attract more bees with honey, so in this time of reflection, just like I forgave my mom, I will forgive those who hurt me. Often times, I do not express my deep feelings, but 2020 got me all the way fucked up. 2020 also gave me time to heal myself. Love and hate two sides of the same coin, both emotions controlled by our soul. In this season of my life, I will not let my emotions get the best of me. So today I declare and decree no one will take me back because there is nothing to go back too. Yesterday is gone, today is now, and tomorrow is not promised. 

Today I forgive.